Know Yourself

If we try to contemplate whether we need a stable family or personal life to do well in job, we might get confused thinking whether it is actually steady and peaceful job that brings stable family or personal life. When we zoom-in further to it, we could see that stress in either of it can impact our lives at both ends. One of the most quintessential ingredients for a composed mind is the support of the family and the confidence that there is someone who genuinely cares for us and roots for us whatever happens.

Unfortunately for many families doesn’t mean the same as painted above in the family portrait. While all the stress in this world could compete and challenge each other for being the toughest one to handle, the real one where the mind really gets crushed is the stress induced by family. Even though there are ideologies which gives direction to form ideal family, there is no real ideal family. It’s like that picture which is beautiful in spite of the imperfections because it brings reality to the frame. Men and women struggle to handle the pressure from family and this stress is not easy to escape. 

Understanding our mind is critical in handling this. If our mind prioritises family above everything, this is the first stress to be managed. A hearty open conversation with your partner and other family member is a good starting point. There is nothing wrong in explaining ourselves to our dear ones when we understand they don’t get our thought process. Mistaking others to understand us is a grave one, better to express our genuine feelings which could be better understood by people around us. Time is key to the lock named upset mind, finding quality time to spend with family and appreciating little things does go a long way. Sharing life goals and experiences always helps to constitute a strong bond between people, and having a common goal could be the holy grail in the stress management journey. 

As always there is no one solution for everyone and everything, for some having a common friend and mediator helps and for some others that would worsen the matter. As in all matters stress, understanding the core of the issue and trying to make changes in life to dilute it would be very helpful. For all these, an equal and active participation is required from all sides, however when you are convinced that the efforts are not fruitful for you and done your best, the second-best method is to find what can set you at peace and adopt it. Before you try any of these at home remember to take a time off from everything else and introspect, there is nothing that time can’t heal and there is nothing that can skip a well-done introspection. 

As Buddha always said, our mind has the answers to every question asked to it. The four noble truths which are the truth of suffering, truth about cause of suffering, truth about end of suffering and truth about the path of end of suffering. Keep asking and when it’s time the answer will come to light. Life is not an escape from suffering or stress, but a fascinating fun filled challenging journey through the paths which lead us to the end of sufferings finding grand solutions which makes the stress disappear from our life forever. 

Know thyself! - Socrates